170- From Pain to Possibility // Practical Rehab Strategies to Reduce Pain with Intimacy

Pelvic floor tips to move from tension and guarding to comfort and confidence

If you’ve been listening to this series and thinking…

“Okay, I understand what might be causing my pain.”
“I see how stress and mental load are affecting my body.”
“But what do I actually DO?”

This episode is your next step.

Pain with intimacy is common — but it is not something you have to push through, numb out, or accept as your new normal.

Today we’re talking about practical, body-based strategies to reduce pelvic floor tension, rebuild safety, and gradually restore comfort and confidence in the bedroom.

Because healing isn’t about forcing relaxation.
It’s about creating safety.

In This Episode, We Cover:

• Why pushing through pain makes it worse
  
  

• The pain → guarding → more pain cycle
  
  

• Why many women with painful intercourse actually have an overactive pelvic floor (not a weak one)
  
  

• The importance of downtraining before strengthening
  
  

• 360 breathing and long exhale techniques to calm tension
  
  

• “Hip breathers” and mobility work that support pelvic relaxation
  
  

• External soft tissue release before internal work
  
  

• How to approach dilators or pelvic wand work safely (if appropriate)
  
  

• The power of slowing down arousal and removing performance pressure
  
  

• Lube, positioning, and small environmental shifts that make a big difference
  
  

• How graded exposure helps retrain the brain and calm pain pathways
  
  

The Big Reframe

Pain with intimacy is not a sign that you are broken.

It is information.

Your nervous system and pelvic floor are communicating something — often about tension, overwhelm, fear, or past experiences.

When we respond with pressure, force, or avoidance, the guarding increases.

When we respond with safety, breath, and gradual progression, the body adapts.

Your brain and pelvic floor are deeply connected — and both can relearn safety.

Practical Starting Points

If you’re experiencing pain with intercourse, consider:

✔️ Pausing penetration temporarily
✔️ Focusing on breath and long exhales daily
✔️ Addressing hip, inner thigh, and glute tension
✔️ Prioritizing arousal before penetration
✔️ Experimenting with positions that give you control
✔️ Removing pressure to “perform”

Remember: intimacy does not equal penetration.
Connection and pleasure are broader than we were taught.

When to See a Pelvic Floor PT

You may benefit from professional support if:

• Pain persists beyond a few months
  
  

• You have a history of tearing or scar tissue
  
  

• You experience severe guarding or anxiety
  
  

• You’re avoiding intimacy entirely
  
  

• DIY approaches aren’t helping
  
  

Inside RESTORE, we focus on breath coordination, nervous system regulation, mobility, and pelvic floor retraining in a progressive, supportive way.

For more complex or severe pain, 1:1 pelvic floor physical therapy may be the best next step.

You do not have to navigate this alone.

Up Next in the Series

In our next episode, we’ll talk about rebuilding confidence and reclaiming pleasure — not just reducing pain.

Because healing is not just about eliminating symptoms.
It’s about expanding what’s possible.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs to hear that pain with intimacy is treatable — and that softness is strength.

~ XO
Dr. Des 💛

 

Want a Structured Way to Rebuild Safety in Your Body?

Check out the FREE Masterclass Pain to Pleasure inside my app Pelvic Floor, Core & More Now!

https://pelvic-floor-core-more.passion.io

🌀 Ready to feel stronger, more confident, and in tune with what it needs?

If you’re done guessing and googling…
If you’re ready to stop modifying your workouts out of fear…
If you’re ready to move, lift, run, and LIVE without leaking, pain, or pressure...

Then it’s time for RESTORE — my 12-week signature pelvic floor & core rehab program Evidence-based. Nervous system-informed. Holistically healing.

Inside RESTORE you’ll get:
✔️ 12 weeks of progressive breathwork, mobility & strength
✔️ 5- and 20-minute workouts to fit your life
✔️ Deep pelvic floor education (with zero fluff)
✔️ Real-life tools to reduce pain, improve leaks, and feel like YOU again
✔️ Access to our private community and support

Inside RESTORE, we cover:

• Breathwork + pelvic floor connection
  
  

• Mobility + posture
  
  

• Nervous system regulation
  
  

• Core control + strength building
  
  

• Real-life application to everyday movement
  
  

• And how to stop leaking, rushing to the bathroom, or feeling disconnected from your core
  
  

You’ll walk away from RESTORE with clarity, confidence, and a body you trust again.

JOIN RESTORE NOW FOR INSTANT ACCESS TO LESSONS AND EXERCISES!!  

https://pelvic-floor-core-more.passion.io/checkout/86181d29-9811-4a33-80df-a82de21fa8fe

Or 

💎 Learn More About RESTORE below, my 12-week program that walks you step by step through pelvic floor and core healing — so you can stop leaking, reduce prolapse symptoms, and feel strong again.

 https://balancedmomtality.com/restore 

💖 Or Want Personalized 1:1 Coaching and Support?

Book a virtual or in-person women’s health coaching/pelvic floor physical therapy session tailored to YOU.
📧 Email: PTDes@balancedmomtality.com

✨ Next Steps:

📲 Download the Pelvic Floor, Core & More App →  for guided breathwork, mobility, and strength progressions you can do at home.

- Download PCM App iTunes: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/pelvic-floor-core-more/id6740750561 

- Download PCM App Google Play:

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.pqw8e051gua.pmh8skrtsapp&pcampaignid=web_share

Or Access Inside the web Browser: https://pelvic-floor-core-more.passion.io/ 

🎧 Don’t forget to subscribe to Pelvic Floor, Core & More so you never miss an empowering episode about pelvic floor health, core strength, and whole-body healing.

 

👉 If this episode resonated with you, share it with a mom friend who needs to hear that healing is possible. And don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss an empowering conversation about pelvic health, core strength, and whole-body healing.

🌿 Join the Momtality Community:

👯‍♀️ Free Facebook Group: Balanced Momtality Wellness + Support
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Found this powerful? Send it to a mama who’s ready to rise — and don’t forget to leave a 5-star review!

💖 Prefer 1:1 or Hybrid Support?

Let’s build a plan just for you. Email PTDes@balancedmomtality.com

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